One thing I’ve noticed about my kids.

[Utah]

I went for a drive with my father today. He is in his 60’s. They way he describes people, it always starts with skin color. Now, he isn’t a racist man and has a very large number of black friends (which is funny seeing how this is Utah, but he is an immigrant, just to get that out of the way). 

But my kids, they NEVER bring up skin color when talking about people. They will say “the loud person” or the “girl with the pretty hair” or “the guy with the cool sunglasses”. 

That is pretty cool. It’s been a good example to me to be careful how I describe, classify, whatever people. 

[PorterRockwell]

Sounds like you are raising them right.  Well done 

[Utah]

I’m starting to learn, the more I keep my mouth shut, the better they become. No need for me to put my crap on them. 

[Newbomb Turk]

So, when I referred to German people as “spike heads” in front of my children, that probably wasn’t cool?

[PorterRockwell]

Turk we all know that anything you do is cool.  

[Utah]

Ha ha. That conjures up an image of ninja turtles battling a bad guy in the 80’s. 

[ironman1315]

It’s only cool if it’s springtime for Germany.

[PorterRockwell]

It sounds as though you are teaching by example.  It appears that racism and some other less desirable  behaviors are slowly being extinguished.   That’s a good thing.  Racism etc needs to be obliterated 

[AZswayze]

Almost anytime anybody tells a story or talks about something that happened where a black person was involved they start by saying “this black guy” or something similar. I don’t think it’s racist or even a problem most of the time. When we’re describing something to somebody we’re essentially painting a picture for them, and it’s easier to see the scene when you have an idea of what people look like.

I think most of us picture white people unless otherwise specified. I don’t believe there’s anything racist or nefarious behind it, but it will be nice when, someday in the far off future, we’re all just the same tannish hue. Then we can worry about hating each other for being assholes instead of just being different shades.

[Utah]

This is exactly my point. In all of those stories, what does skin color have to do with any of them…unless by being black shows how dumb/silly/mean whatever. It’s irrelevant to 99% of stories. 

“I saw this black gun run a red light.”

or 

“I saw this black guy dancing silly at a party.”

See? It’s irrelevant…unless there is some stereotype you’re trying to reinforce. 

Why not, “I saw this moron run a red light.”

or

“Man, this guy could really dance at the party last night.”

[AZswayze]

Black guy dancing silly? You just killed the illusion.

I get what you’re saying but my point is that it’s more a part of our story telling structure as it helps paint a more vivid picture. Is it unnecessary at times, sure, but it’s not necessarily indicative of racism or prejudice.

[Utah]

Ha ha. Good point. 

[SkinyUte]

I think most of us picture white people unless otherwise specified.

If you’re white, sure. I’d hazard a guess that probably encompasses most of us here, so you’re probably correct.

I would also guess that most people would pick someone who matches their own ethnic background when given a ‘blank slate’ person in a story. I could be wrong though…will have to do a little research.

[AZswayze]

Yeah. I’ve never done any research on the subject. This is 100% my own naive opinion and I could be completely in the wrong. It’s interesting though and kinda funny that Utah brought it up because my daughter and I were having this same discussion just a couple of days ago.

[UTE98]

I thought back to a time when I was living in VA, my now 18 year old was telling a story and just matter of factly sad “This brown skinned girl…” She was like 5 or 6 a the time, our neighbors and quite a big portion of her school were not WASPs. It was just said in this matter of fact sweet little voice, I think that was the best way she could describe the girl.

Being from Boise, ID, or as I call it “crackerville” and just to be clear I used that with mostly my black co-workers and black friends, I made the joke if a person of color showed up in Boise there was either an athletic event or they were Native American. I used to supervise about 90 and I loved it when one of them told me, “Next time you bring lunch make sure you ask your PHAT girls for advice on the food.”

Yes there is racism in the U.S. however I don’t think most who are accused of it actually have ill will or mal intent. Too often we just don’t know how to deal with it. We all say stupid things every day. Why just today I heard a friend, after hearing the other friend’s car was stolen last night in a more affluent neighborhood, “That’s why I’d never live there, thanks for keeping my car safe.” I don’t think he intended it to sound how it did. But man I almost stopped breathing, thinking did he really just say that? 

But the next time you say “black mail” “black hole” “black mark” or “blackball” “blacklist” etc, make sure you don’t say it around my old co-worker, loved the guy, but man did he mess with me and others who’d just met him. “Why’s it gotta be black mail?”

However I loved haning out with the guy, I learned so much from him. If you ever get the chance read “The miseducation of the Negro” by Carter Godwin Woodson, it was written in the 1930s. My co-worker read it at his Black College in Atlanta and recommended it to me.

I could tell you second hand stories for days. While I did not like the weather back in Northern Virginia I count myself very lucky to have been able to experience Virginia. It challenged my book learning about the south, race, the civil war and many things.

I tell you to pick up the book at the library like I did, however not many libraries in Utah or the West probably carry it. I think the problem is when we don’t try to understand each other or in other words ignorance, as in not knowing or understanding others.

[Author]

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